


Want

by IvanW



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Gay Sex, Heterosexual Sex, Hurt/Comfort, Love, M/M, Romance, Slash, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-12
Updated: 2014-05-01
Packaged: 2018-01-17 11:54:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 14,644
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1386694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IvanW/pseuds/IvanW
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clueless Kirk and Clueless Spock work towards finding out it is each other they want.</p><p>Post-Star Trek Into Darkness.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Jim Kirk often came to the observation deck to think. There were four places he did so, his quarters, the medbay, the gym, and the observation deck.

Sometimes he found his quarters too stifling, as he did now. And he chose medbay when he wanted Bones to sound out issues with him. Something he did not seek now. He found himself far too weary for the gym. By process of elimination, he came here.

Generally when he came here it was for deepest contemplation and he never found himself with company as he did now.

“Spock?”

His first officer stiffened but did not turn around from his view of the stars. “Captain.”

“Hey, sorry. I didn’t think anyone was over here. I’ll go somewhere else.”

“No apology is required. You may stay if you wish.”

Jim shook his head even though Spock was not looking at him. “I don’t want to disturb you. Are you all right? I’ve just…I’ve never seen you here.”

Spock nodded. “Generally I do not come here but I found myself unable to meditate.”

“Are you all right?” Jim asked again. He came to stand next to Spock, but his gaze stayed on Spock’s face instead of the view. Spock’s face was as impassive as ever.

“Nyota terminated our relationship.”

“She did?” Jim did look away from Spock now, licked his lips. “I’m sorry. Did she say why?”

“She wished to take our relationship to the next level.”

He frowned. “Next level?”

Spock shifted slightly. “Nyota expressed a desire to marry.”

“Oh.” Jim blinked several times, tried to focus his breathing. “I suppose that is the natural progression of romantic relationships.”

“Indeed,” Spock agreed.

“And you didn’t want to?”

“I did not.”

“Okay.” Jim blew out a breath. “So because you didn’t want to get married, she broke things off?”

“That is essentially correct.”

Be a friend, Jim, he told himself.

“Spock, maybe she just needs some time. I doubt it’s over really. This wouldn’t be the first time you two have had issues. Just tell her that eventually you’ll get married, maybe not now but—”

“I will never desire to marry Nyota,” Spock said quietly. “I care for her a great deal. I would not have engaged in an amorous relationship with her were that not the case.”

 _Just stun me with a phaser now_.

“Then I’m not really sure what the problem is, Spock. Why don’t you want to marry her?”

“As much as I care for Nyota, I have discovered I have a much deeper regard for another. Under those circumstances marrying or bonding with her would be impossible. It is best that our relationship was terminated. I should have instigated this myself when I first realized the depth of my regard, however…”

Jim waited a moment for Spock to go on but he did not, so Jim slowly exhaled. “Well, I am sorry, Spock. Breakups are never easy. Even when it’s for the best. Look, I’ll leave you to your thoughts and just let me know if there’s anything I can do for you.”

He turned to leave the room.

“Captain?”

“Yeah?”

Spock turned to look at him. “Why were you coming here?”

“Oh. Um.” Jim licked his lips. “Family problems.”

“If you wish, I will listen.”

“Nah, I don’t want to burden you.”

Spock inclined his head. “As you wish.”

“It’s just…my mom is getting married _again_.”

“How many times has she been married?”

“This is her fourth marriage. Or will be. Three since my dad died.”

“Perhaps she is lonely and desires companionship.”

“I’m sure. But she always picks these assholes. They aren’t worthy of her and I try to tell her not to do it and she gets mad.”

Spock nodded. “Perhaps rather than seeking your opinion on her upcoming nuptials she merely wants your support.”

Jim frowned. “Yeah, I guess.”

Spock inclined his head. “I believe in prior conversations with Dr. McCoy I have heard you refer to her as a grown ass woman.”

Jim laughed. “Yeah, I did.”

“Then the choices she makes, however unfortunate, are hers to make, Jim. I am certain you would not wish her to interfere with your choices whatever they may be.”

“You’re right as always, Spock.” He smiled. “Thanks.”

“It is my duty to serve you in all ways possible, Captain.”

And didn’t that just sound way too sexual to Jim’s perverted mind.

“Well, thanks. And that’s my cue to leave. I’ve got a dozen or so reports to do before I can go to sleep. Goodnight, Spock.”

“Goodnight, Captain.”

****

“Captain Kirk, you’re practically famous you know.” The Orion female with long curly dark hair practically purred. Her fingers dug into his arm a bit and he could feel her strong pheromones working their wiles on him. He was definitely aroused.

Jim swallowed. “I wouldn’t say famous.”

“Really? What would you say?” She leaned into him and ran her tongue along the shell of his ear.

“I would say, I really need to go,” he said, quickly disengaging her grip and smiling apologetically.

The bar was crowded. Really crowded. He’d actually come in here looking for Bones. His friend had lost a crew member in surgery and had been upset. It was someone Bones knew pretty well and he’d taken it hard. Sulu had said he’d seen Bones go into the bar.

They were on Deep Space Station 7 for a few Federation important meetings and the crew member had gotten caught in an explosion and badly burned. There was nothing Bones could have done. Jim really had no desire whatsoever to go to the bar, he really hadn’t. He had planned on seeking Spock out to ask him for a game of chess. But then Sulu had commed him about Bones.

He couldn’t see Bones but he had seen Spock, strangely enough, and he had been with Uhura. Okay, and Scotty and Carol Marcus and a few others. But Jim had been surprised. It wasn’t like they couldn’t be friends still, he guessed. Jim had been friends with former lovers, right? Or maybe not. He didn’t know. Whatever. It just seemed so soon.

“Go?” She pouted. “Oh, come on, Captain. Stay with me a little while. One drink with Marta, please?”

“Well, really, I’m trying to find someone.”

Marta rested her hand on Jim’s thigh. “I’m someone. And I promise you that you will have a fabulous time.”

“No, really. Thanks. But I can’t.” Jim extricated himself again. “I really have to find my friend.”

He walked away from her and saw Bones toward the entrance and he was being helped from the bar by Chekov and Sulu. Jim exhaled in relief. Well, that took care of that. Now he could go back to the ship himself.

Jim made his way to the entryway of the bar and stopped in his tracks. There by the bathrooms stood Spock and Uhura. He had his arms around her waist and her arms were looped around his neck.

Jim couldn’t breathe. His chest constricted and his throat closed. If this was how they acted when they broke up…well fuck. He couldn’t look at this.

He turned around and reentered the bar and went right up to Marta. Jim smiled his sexiest smile and she grinned in return.

“You know what, honey? I’ve changed my mind. Let’s go all fucking night.”

“Now you’re talking,” she purred into his ear. “Come with me.”

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

The captain was coming out of his quarters at the same time Spock was. His hair appeared damp as though he had recently showered though Spock had not heard him in their shared bathroom. Dark smudges appeared under his eyes and his neck was covered in bite marks and bruises. Spock was instantly alarmed though he suspected where they had come from.

The captain glanced at Spock and he smiled but it was strained. “Morning, Spock.”

“Good morning, Captain.”

“I’m heading to medbay before the bridge.”

“So you were injured by the Orion female?”

Kirk’s eyes narrowed and Spock understood his captain thought he was very close to overstepping some kind of line. “How do you know about that?”

Spock fell into step beside Kirk as they entered the turbolift. He knew because Nyota had insisted he go with her and the others to the bar last night. Spock had not wanted to go. He’d wanted to seek out his captain to spend time with him and if that was not possible then to work in the labs. But Nyota had said it was more likely Kirk would be at the bar and so he had allowed himself to be talked into it. And then he’d been the unfortunate witness of an Orion woman propositioning Kirk.

“I was at the bar on the space station last night,” Spock explained. “And I noticed you conversing with her.”

Kirk nodded. “I saw you there with Uhura.” The turbolift opened on the deck with the medbay and Spock followed him. “You guys work things out?”

“Work things out, Captain?”

“Yeah, you know. Get back together. You looked like you were.” Kirk shrugged. “That’s nice if you are.”

Before Spock could provide a response, his captain had gone into the medbay.

“Hey, Bones,” the captain said as soon as they saw the doctor.

Dr. McCoy scowled. “What the hell happened to you?”

“Went to the bar last night looking for you, actually,” Kirk said. “How are you feeling?”

“Better than you I’d say. How’d you get that looking for me?” McCoy asked. He was already running a regenerator over the bite marks.

“Orion. Saw me looking around and well…” Kirk shrugged in a way Spock did not find at all pleasant. “I saw Sulu and Chekov take you out. I was about to follow you out, but I changed my mind.” And he glanced inexplicably at Spock.

“You should have changed it back. Jesus, Jim, did she damage you anywhere else?”

The captain sighed. “Yeah there are bite marks on my chest and back, too.” He pulled up his shirts to his armpits to reveal several bites.

Spock tried not to visibly flinch. Unreasonable and unwelcome jealousy caused him to clench his fists. “Should she be reported for assault on a Starfleet officer?”

The captain snorted. “Hardly. Trust me, Spock, it was completely consensual.”

Spock did trust his captain which was why something very unpleasant curled in his stomach.

Dr. McCoy sighed. “Well that’s the last of them. The bruises are lighter but not gone altogether. Easy on the wild ones, Jim.”

Kirk smiled. “She was just what I needed last night, Bones. I’ll come and see you after shift, okay?”

“Yeah, okay.”

They left the medbay.

“You are concerned for Dr. McCoy’s welfare?”

The captain nodded. “He was friends with Jenkins, the man who died.”

“I was unaware.” They entered the turbolift. “Captain?”

“Yeah?’

“What made you conclude that Nyota and I were once again engaged in a romantic relationship?”

“I saw you at the bar.”

“I was at the bar with Nyota but also with several others.”

Kirk shook his head. “No. I saw you together. You had your arms around her waist and she had hers around your neck.”

“I-I see.”

“Look it’s none of my business anyway.”

“That is true,” Spock said, and then instantly regretted it when his captain flinched. “However, Nyota and I are not—”

But the captain interrupted him with a sort of hand chop. He smiled. “Really, it’s not my business, Mr. Spock. You owe me no explanations and really, I don’t even care. As long as you’re happy and able to do your job, that’s all that matters to me. Okay?”

Spock closed his mouth, then stiffened. “Yes, Captain.”

The doors opened on to the bridge and Kirk patted Spock’s arm. “Good.”

“Keptin on the bridge.”

And Kirk went to his chair. “Mr. Sulu, take us out.”

“Aye, sir.”

****

 “How are you feeling, Bones?” Jim asked, as he settled across from Bones after their shifts. They sat in the recreation room, Jim drinking an ale and Bones drinking a glass of bourbon. They had a card game between them, started and quickly forgotten.

“I don’t know. Okay, I guess. I’ve lost patients before, Jim. I’m not just starting out.”

“But Jenkins was a friend.”

“Yeah.” Bones sighed. “We shared a love of bourbon of all things.” He stared into his glass. “But I knew all about his hopes and dreams. You don’t just forget something like that.”

“I know. Maybe M’Benga should have taken it?”

Bones shook his head. “I was the doctor on duty and no matter who had been there I would have felt the same. Thanks for letting me be the one to write his family.”

Jim smiled a little. “I’m sure they liked hearing from someone who really knew him.”

“Yeah. Never easy to hear, though, no matter who tells you.” Bones grimaced. “I don’t know how you do it, Jim.”

“It’s a terrible task, Bones.”

They fell silent, each in their own thoughts.

“What was that Orion girl really about, Jim?”

Jim shrugged. “I felt like having sex. I’m an adult.”

“Yeah but to let her injure you?”

“It was no big deal, Bones. Just some bites. I’ve been with Orions before.”

“Gaila,” Bones acknowledged. “And I don’t think she was your typical Orion.”

Jim nodded. “She was a sweetheart. Didn’t deserve what happened to her.”

“None of them do,” Bones agreed. “Is it Spock?”

“Is what Spock?”

“The reason you went fucking around with some feral Orion.”

Jim raised his ale to his lips and took a drink. “What does Spock have to do with anything?”

Bones grimaced. “I don’t know. But isn’t it usually something to do with the hobgoblin?”

“He was with Uhura. At the bar.”

“Thought you said they broke up.”

“I don’t know. Maybe they did. He sort of implied they did, I think. They looked cozy anyway. But even if they did, it doesn’t matter, Bones. He’s in love with someone else.”

“Who?”

“Hell if I know, he didn’t say. And I didn’t ask. I’m pretty sure he’d say it was none of my business like he always does, anyway.”

“Maybe it’s one of the native plants he experiments on in the labs,” Bones said with a laugh.

Jim chuckled. “Maybe. It’s his thing, whoever it is. My job is to be his captain. And maybe his friend if he lets me.”

“How’s that going?”

“The friendship?”

“Uh-huh.” Bones took a drink of his bourbon.

“Okay. I mean I think we’re friends. Sort of. I mean he told me we were on my deathbed. Well, not deathbed…when I was dying. But since we started the mission, I can’t say we’ve had any friend moments. Not like you and me anyway. Actually I was planning on asking him to play chess with me last night, but that didn’t happen.”

“Sorry, Jim.”

“Don’t worry about it. I got sex instead, so who am I to complain?” Jim grinned.

Bones sighed. “Okay, whatever you say.” 


	3. Chapter 3

“You’re staring,” Nyota said softly.

Spock forced himself to return his attention to Nyota who sat across from him in the recreation room. “I apologize.”

She smiled. “It’s all right, you know. It’s not like I don’t know.”

“It is still not appropriate to be staring at him at all let alone while we are supposed to be engaged in a chess match.”

“Well, you always kick my ass anyway. Even when you don’t pay attention to the game like now.” Her gaze went to where the captain sat talking in low tones with Dr. McCoy. “You could ask him to play. Sulu says he’s highly skilled.”

“He is otherwise occupied.” With Dr. McCoy as usual, Spock did not add. It was not logical to feel jealousy over the captain’s close friendship with the doctor. The captain had agreed that he and Spock were friends, yet he did not wish to spend any time with Spock.

“Well, if you don’t ask him, he’s going to make other plans.” She sighed. “I can’t believe I’m even helping you.”

“I apologize,” Spock said again. “We are not required to speak of him.”

“I know, Spock, but whenever he’s around you pay attention to only him.” She rested her chin in her hand. “Don’t you think I saw it even before I talked about marriage to you?”

Spock quirked a brow. “You did?”

Nyota laughed, low and throaty. “You aren’t as subtle as you think you are. I think that was why I got so pushy with it. I thought maybe…well, that doesn’t matter now.”

“I did not mean to cause you pain, Nyota.”

“I know that, honey. And I’m getting over it. Slowly.” She sighed again. “I can’t say I don’t wish you loved me though.”

“I feel a great deal of affection for you,” Spock insisted. “And much of that was of a romantic nature or I would not have been in a relationship with you.”

“We both know in a contest, you’d pick him every time.”

“Romantic feels are not a contest.”

She laughed at that. “Sure they are. And you didn’t deny it either.”

“I do not wish to lie to you, Nyota. That is why I advised you of my regard for him in the first place.”

“I know, Spock.” She moved her chess piece when she noticed it was her turn. “You’re staring again.”

“He does not look well. I think I should ask Dr. McCoy to make sure he is not having ill effects from the blood transfusion.”

“I’m sure he’s fine. He just looks tired.” Nyota snorted. “And it’s no wonder.”

“Clarify.”

She shook her head. “I don’t think it’s what you want to hear.”

“If it concerns the captain then I do.”

“Not this.” Nyota bit her lip. “A friend in engineering had a room at the space station right next to that Orion girl’s room. She said they were really loud and pretty much all night.”

Spock exhaled slowly. “I am aware he engaged in sexual congress with her.”

“I know. And I’m sorry. I wish I could punch him for hurting you.”

“He is unaware of my regard,” Spock said. “And he does not return it. It would be illogical for him to refrain from his normal behavior.”

“I don’t have to approve of his normal behavior,” Nyota said. “You could ask him.”

“Ask him?”

“If he wants you the way you want him.”

“I would never.”

“How are you ever gonna know then, Spock?” Nyota sighed.

Spock kept his eyes on his captain as he leaned in closer to Dr. McCoy and said something directly into the doctor’s ear. His hand shook as he moved his chess piece. “Checkmate.”

****

Spock held out a PADD to the Captain. “Sir?”

The captain was in his chair staring rather fixedly at something on his own PADD. His brows were furrowed. He blinked rapidly, Spock watching his lashes the entire time, and finally glanced at Spock. “What?”

“The report on the planet you asked for.”

Kirk stared at Spock for several seconds, his expression blank, then very slowly he nodded. “Right. Thank you, Mr. Spock.” He took the PADD.

“Is there something wrong, Captain?” Spock asked.

Jim smiled slightly. “Nah, Spock. Everything’s fine. Status, Mr. Sulu.”

“We’ll reach orbit of Hydra III in ten minutes, Captain.”

“Captain, I have the governor of Hydra III hailing us,” Uhura said.

“Onscreen, Lieutenant.”

An older bearded man appeared on the screen and he smiled when he saw the captain. “Jim Kirk! I was told it was you, but I wasn’t sure until I saw you for myself.”

“Grayson Lewis. Wow, When I saw the name of the governor it never occurred to me,” Jim greeted the man warmly. “How long have you been governor there?”

“Five years now.”

“Small world.”

“Oh, and Jim,” Governor Lewis said. “I have a surprise for you.”

The captain’s smile was quizzical. “Surprise?”

“Hang on.” And Lewis disappeared off screen.

“Captain?” Spock looked down at Kirk with a quirk of his eyebrow.

“Oh, yeah. Grayson Lewis used to live near us in Riverside. God, haven’t seen him in years.”

Then Spock heard a high pitched squeal and an extremely beautiful blonde woman appeared on screen. She was dressed in flowing purple robes and her blonde hair had been pulled back away from her face with elaborate jeweled barrettes. Spock went rigid next to his Captain even as he could not help but notice Kirk and every man on the bridge straighten up at her appearance.

“Jimmy!” she exclaimed in an overly excited voice.

The captain actually stood. “Rachel? Rachel?”

She laughed. “Yes!”

“Oh. My. God.” Jim’s smile lit up the bridge. “It’s been how long? You were just a kid when I saw you last.”

“Not a kid anymore.” She beamed a smile at the captain nearly as bright as the one he flashed her.

“No.” The captain took a step forward, his eyes never leaving the screen. “Definitely not. You look…wow.”

The woman laughed again. It irritated Spock. “You look amazing yourself, Jimmy. I can’t wait to see you.”

“Well, I have to say I’m looking forward to seeing you again, too.”

Governor Lewis appeared next to her again and he put his arm around her. “My daughter’s something else, isn’t she, Jim?”

“She is, sir,” Kirk agreed and Spock felt that unwelcome sick feeling in his stomach again.

“Come down here, Jim. We’d like to treat you to a great dinner and some hospitality.”

The woman smirked, a sexual invitation clear in her eyes as she looked at the captain. Spock certainly saw it. And he felt an illogical urge to neck pinch her.

“I’ll be there soon, thank you. Kirk out.”

And the screen went blank. But the captain’s smile was brighter than Spock had seen in weeks. Perhaps it was Kirk he wanted to neck pinch.

“Grayson Lewis’s daughter,” Kirk said to Spock.

“So I heard,” Spock said stiffly.

“Small world, really.” Kirk headed to the turbolift. “You have the conn.”

Spock followed him into the turbolift. “Captain?”

“Yeah?”

“I request to be allowed in the landing party.”

“Why?”

“It is my duty as first officer to see to the safety of the captain. In addition, the original invitation sent by the governor for a state dinner included me.”

The captain sighed. “Very well. But if you’re coming I might as well ask Bones, too.”

Spock inclined his head. “And a security detail.”

“All right, Spock. Whatever you say.”

 


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Heterosexual sex. (only chapter)

Jim waited rather impatiently in the transporter room to beam down to the surface of Hydra III. He was taking a security team at Spock’s insistence. Bones was coming with him too. But he’d been rather surprised when Spock had indicated he wanted to be in the landing party.

“You really don‘t need to go, Spock.”

“So you have said three times now, Captain. Is there a reason you don’t want me to go?” Spock asked coolly as they waited for Bones to arrive.

“What? No, no. Of course not. But I know these people. They aren't dangerous or anything.”

“I still insist on a security force, Captain. And if they are not dangerous there can be no reason for your objection to my attending the dinner with Governor Lewis, especially as he has been advised I will be in attendance.”

Jim sighed. “Fine. You win as always.”

“It is not a contest, Captain.”

Jim rolled his eyes. “Where the hell is Bones?”

“Here, Jim,” Bones said as he entered the transporter room. He clapped Jim on the back. “Keep your shirt on. That girl will still be waiting when we arrive.”

He laughed. “Yeah, yeah, be quiet.” They moved toward the transporter pads. “Energize.”

When they re-materialized on the planet surface, Jim saw Grayson Lewis and his daughter, Rachel waiting nearby. Lewis was adorned in blue and red robes while Rachel wore the purple robes she’d had on earlier on the view screen.

“Jimmy!” she exclaimed immediately and rushed to him to throw her arms around him. “Oh, it’s been so long."

Jim was a little surprised when she peppered his face with kisses. “Hey, hey.” He laughed. “It’s good to see you too.”

Lewis grinned and shook Jim’s hand. “As you can see, Jim, we’re all very glad to have you.” He turned to Spock. “You must be Mr. Spock.”

“Indeed, Governor.” Spock had become stiffer still if that were possible, Jim realized. But if the Governor was offended he didn't show it.

“Yes, this is my first officer, and my chief medical officer, Leonard McCoy.”

“Dr. McCoy,” Lewis said pleasantly, shaking Bones’ hand.

“And our security officers, Mallory, Jones, and Thomas.”

“Gentlemen. You’ll find you don’t need security, Jim. Hydra III is very peaceful and we have no trouble here.” Lewis turned to his daughter. “And this of course is my beautiful daughter, Rachel.”

“Daddy,” she admonished her father with a smile. She grabbed Jim’s arm. “Come, Jimmy, dinner is this way.” She didn't spare a glance for the rest of his party, Jim noticed.

****

“Isn't it beautiful?” Rachel asked Jim after dinner as she showed him around the grounds of the governor’s home.

He smiled as he looked at her. “It certainly is.”

She laughed. “I didn't mean me, but thank you. You've grown to be such a charmer. And so gorgeous.”

Jim shook his head. “I’m sorry to hear about your mother.”

“Yes, it’s just Daddy and I now. I’m so glad you agreed to stay here tonight. Your first officer was so disapproving I thought you might say no.”

“Spock? He means well. He’s very protective.”

“Well, there’s nothing to fear from us,” Rachel said with a laugh as she threaded her fingers with his. “I've never met a Vulcan before. He’s rather intimidating, isn't he?”

“Not really.”

“I don’t think I like him.”

Jim laughed. “Why not?”

“I don’t know. I just don’t. Enough about him, though.” She drew him underneath a big leafy tree and put her arms around his neck. “Kiss me.”

Jim was nothing if not obliging and since she had been touching him since he arrived he was already aroused and willing. He ensnared her waist with an arm and pulled her close, lowering his lips to hers. She tasted of strawberries and cream and a little of the fruit juice they’d served at dinner.

“Mm.”

She drew back with a smile. “Is that good or bad?”

“It’s very good,” he assured her, and pulled her in for another kiss. He slipped his tongue into her mouth and was met with hers. She sagged into his arms.

After a while she broke away again to breathe, and she looked into his eyes, her green eyes shining. “I had a bit of a crush on you when we were neighbors.”

He smiled and kissed her nose. “Did you?”

“Uh-huh. Those eyes. So dreamy.”

He laughed. “If you say so.”

“I do.” She grabbed his hand. “Come.”

She went through a door in the garden that led them back into the house and then she pulled him down a hallway to a blue door.

“Where are we?”

“Can’t you guess, Jimmy? My room. You do want to stay in my room, don’t you?” She smoothed her hands over his biceps. He’d been half hard all night and now his cock was at full attention.

“There’s nowhere else I’d rather be, Rach.”

She opened the door and yanked him inside. “No one’s called me that since I left Iowa. God, I missed you, Jimmy.”

She did not have a traditional bed but several colorful, big fluffy pillows all over the floor of her room. Jim removed his undershirt and command shirt as she started taking out the jeweled barrettes in her hair. She pushed him down on the pillows, smiling.

“I can’t believe you’re really here,” she whispered. She pulled off his boots and then went immediately for the fastening on his pants. “I want you, Jimmy. Please make love to me.”

And then they were kissing again and scrambling to get each other out of their clothes. When they were both nude, Jim slid his callused hands over the skin of her smooth creamy breasts, drawing moans from her as his thumbs skittered over her nipples.

“Oh God, Jimmy,” she gasped, cradling his head to her left breast. He needed no further invitation as he sucked her nipple into his mouth. He feasted on first one and then the other breast, and when he moved his hand between her legs to stroke his thumb over her clit, he felt her wetness.

Rachel cupped his jaw and pulled him up to kiss her lips again and then she slid her hand down to his cock, which jumped at her touch. He stroked her clit until she was writhing beneath him, desperately kissing him.

Jim rose above her, parting her legs with a knee. He grabbed her wrists and held them above her head as he kissed her.

She wrapped her legs around him. “Please take me.”

He pushed inside her and she welcomed him, clinging to him, rising to meet his thrusts with her hips, her breasts brushing his chest, her lips fastened to his. It could have been an hour, it could have been fifteen minutes, Jim didn’t know for he had lost track of time while he moved within her. Blocking all thoughts of anything…anyone out of his mind. He didn’t want to think with his heart, just his body.

“Rachel,” he groaned as she clenched around him and he was lost to his own release.

****

He woke in the morning to the sound of a waterfall. His head was resting on Rachel’s breast, though it was now covered. Jim blinked and sat up.

“Good morning,” she said as she too sat up. She smiled brightly. “I was up earlier, but you were sleeping so soundly. I have breakfast waiting for you.” She gestured toward a table laid out with pancake looking things and the same juice she had served him last night.

“Oh, great,” Jim said, pulling on his pants. “Thank you. Hope it wasn't too much trouble.”

Rachel leaned over to kiss him. “It wasn't. But I wanted to talk to you.”

“Oh?”

“Jimmy, do you really have to go back? You could stay here with me and Daddy.”

“What?” He laughed, shook his head, and stood up.

“I know you’re in Starfleet but this place is paradise, isn't it? I’m sure you’ll think so. We can get married and have a family. I used to dream of that with you.” Rachel got up too. “Doesn't that sound wonderful?”

He ran his fingers through his hair. “Rachel, sweetheart, I’m a starship captain. I have responsibilities.”

“You could give all that up and stay with me.” Rachel went over to the table and poured him a glass of juice. “Don’t you want to be with me, Jimmy?”

“It’s not that, it’s—” Jim took the glass of juice she thrust into his hand.

“Drink some juice. You don’t have to decide right now.”

“Honey, I am decided. I’m captain of the Enterprise.”

Rachel smiled and kissed him. “Drink.”

Shrugging, Jim took a couple of sips of the sweet and tart tasting juice. “It’s good.”

“I knew you’d like it. You can have all the juice you want if you stay on Hydra III,” she purred. “You want to, don’t you, Jimmy?”

He smiled and took another sip. “Yeah, yeah, I do.”


	5. Chapter 5

The first thing Spock noticed when his captain reappeared in the morning accompanied by the woman, Rachel, was that he could not seem to keep his eyes off her. Spock was aware that Kirk was promiscuous and liked women a great deal, but he also knew his captain was very businesslike when it came to his duties on the Enterprise. He did not even glance at Spock or Dr. McCoy as he and the woman entered the main chambers of the governor’s home.

“What’s wrong with Jim?” Dr. McCoy asked. “He looks like a happy zombie.”

“I do not know, doctor. But I do not like it.”

“Good morning, Jim,” Governor Lewis said, smiling broadly. “I trust you slept well?”

“Yes, thank you.”

“Daddy,” Rachel said, taking her father’s arm. “I've been talking to Jimmy about staying here with us instead of going back to his ship.”

“Well, that’s splendid,” Lewis exclaimed.

Spock stiffened and next to him the doctor gasped.

“What the hell?” McCoy said out loud. “Jim?”

For the first time, their captain looked in their direction. Normally Spock was struck by the passion and intensity in his blue eyes but now they looked lifeless, almost as disturbing as they did when the captain died. Spock was instantly alarmed.

“This place is paradise, Bones,” Kirk said, smiling. “How can I resist the opportunity to settle here?”

“Because, Jim, you are the captain of the Enterprise and have obligations and responsibilities and you love space,” McCoy said angrily. “Stay here? This doesn't sound like you! You haven’t seen these people in years and now—”

“I can understand your confusion, doctor,” Governor Lewis interrupted the doctor’s emotional tirade. “But surely you don’t believe there is any coercion on our part? Captain Kirk can do as he pleases, of course. Isn’t that right, Rachel?”

She smiled and looped her arm with Captain Kirk’s. Spock wished to remove it. “Of course, Daddy. We only want Jimmy to be happy. No matter his decision.”

Dr. McCoy opened his mouth to say something else.

“Doctor,” Spock said, drawing him slightly away from the others as they began to talk. “It is necessary to get the captain away from the governor and his daughter so that you can examine him.”

“How do we manage that?”

Spock inclined his head. “When the captain collapses, insist you must beam him back to the ship.”

Dr. McCoy frowned. “Collapses?”

Spock said nothing further but walked over to where Kirk stood with Rachel. The governor had stepped away to speak with an aide and the woman was showing the captain an elaborate fish tank filled with exotic colorful fish.

“Fascinating,” Spock said, leaning in between them.

Kirk looked at Spock and smiled. “They’re pretty, aren't they?”

“Yes, Captain.” He put his hand on the captain’s shoulder. The captain had turned back to look at the tank and Spock squeezed.

“Jimmy!” Rachel exclaimed as Kirk fell to the floor.

McCoy rushed forward, glancing quickly at Spock. He had his tricorder out. “I’m gonna have to take him up to medbay on the ship.”

Rachel frowned. “Back to the ship? But what’s wrong with him?”

“Probably a fever. He’s burning up.”

“A fever? He doesn't seem hot. Daddy, don’t we have—”

“I have the best equipment up there,” Dr. McCoy insisted.

Governor Lewis came over. “Well, if you are sure.”

“Very. And Spock, you should come too,” McCoy said. “In case whatever Jim has is contagious.”

“Contagious?” Rachel exclaimed. “He doesn't have anything! He was with me all night. There’s nothing wrong with him. Daddy!”

“Now, Rachel, let the captain’s people check him out. There’s no harm in that, is there?”

“But.” She bit her lip. She glared at Spock. “No, I suppose not.”

McCoy flipped out his communicator. “McCoy to Enterprise. Three to beam up.”

****

“No doubt about it, he was given something down there,” McCoy grimaced as he turned away from the still unconscious captain.

“What, doctor?”

“I don’t know, Spock. But it’s still in his bloodstream.”

“Has it done permanent damage?” Spock asked.

“No, it acts like a narcotic. If he’s not given any more of it, it will eventually leave his system and he’ll be back to normal.” McCoy frowned. “I think.”

Kirk moaned and then opened his eyes, blinking rapidly. He stared at the ceiling for a moment and then looked around. “Bones?”

“Welcome back, Jim.”

“Why am I in the medbay?”

“Well—”

Spock stepped forward. “It was necessary to incapacitate you for your welfare, Captain.”

Kirk frowned. “You neck pinched me?”

“Affirmative.”

“Okay. You two better get to explaining right now.” The captain struggled to sit up, then sort of rolled his eyes. “Ugh. What the hell?”

Dr. McCoy righted the captain. “Easy, Jim. You’ve been drugged.”

“Yeah, I feel kind of dizzy.” He sat up and shook his head slowly. “All right, Spock, tell me what’s going on.”

Spock straightened. “It was necessary to extricate you from the influence of Rachel Lewis.”

“Rachel?”

“Yeah, Jim, I don’t know what exactly, but she gave you something down there. It’s mostly gone, but I found traces of it in your bloodstream.”

A muscle in Kirk’s jaw jumped. “The juice.”

“The stuff they served at dinner last night?” Dr. McCoy asked.

“Yeah. She kept pushing it at me last night and again this morning.” The captain eyed the doctor. “You didn’t drink it?”

“Fruit juice?” McCoy grimaced. “Hell, no. Lewis offered me some of his twelve year old Scotch.”

His gaze switched to Spock. “You?”

“Negative, Captain. I had tea. The effects of whatever was in your juice appeared to render you extremely susceptible to suggestion.”

Kirk sighed. “In plain standard, Mr. Spock.”

“You were gonna stay on Hydra III with the girl,” McCoy said.

“I would never agree to that,” the captain insisted.

“Perhaps not normally but you did appear to be about to agree to stay,” Spock told him.

“Hell.”

“Good thing you have us to keep you from making stupid mistakes,” McCoy said with a smile. “If you’d stop thinking with your—”

“Bones!”

Dr. McCoy chuckled. “I’m just saying.”

“Well, be quiet. No one asked you.” The captain stood up, swayed a little, but steadied himself with a hand on the biobed. “Any idea how long I’m gonna feel like this?”

“Since I’m not even sure what it is she gave you, not really. My best guess is a few hours.”

“When I woke up this morning, I was myself. No weirdness. I remember she brought up staying on Hydra III and having children—”

“You with a brood of kids?” McCoy scoffed.

Spock did not like the sound of such a thing either but he chose not to comment and decided that was likely the best recourse since the captain was once again glaring at the doctor.

“The point is, then she gave me juice. I kind of don’t remember much after that.”

“We need to determine if it was Rachel Lewis acting alone or if Governor Lewis was aware of her intentions,” Spock said. “I have already notified Starfleet of the recent developments, Captain.”

“Good. We need to go back down there.” The captain started walking toward the medbay exit, Spock and McCoy on his heels. “Oh, and Spock?”

“Captain?”

“I really don’t want to thank you for neck pinching me, but, well, thanks.”

Spock arched a brow. “I was merely doing my duty as your first officer.”

Kirk smiled. “I know.”

****

“Jim, are you sure you’re okay to go back down there?” Dr. McCoy asked the captain as they entered the transporter room.

“Well, you’re the doctor, Bones. What do you think?”

“You seem okay but what happens if that girl works her feminine wiles on you?”

Spock’s eyebrow rose. “Feminine wiles, doctor?”

“Yeah, Spock. Human males can’t seem to help themselves around beautiful women. And Jim’s among the worst.”

“Jesus, Bones, I’m not that bad.”

“If you say so…Jimmy.”

“Actually, Bones, maybe you should stay behind.” The captain got on the transporter.

“Hell, no.” McCoy scowled. “Somebody has to keep an eye on you.”

“I will be there, doctor.”

“Yeah? And what is your medical knowledge, Spock? In case you haven’t noticed Jim’s always getting himself in trouble.”

“Hey.”

Spock nodded. “That is certainly true.”

“Energize.”

As soon as they reached the governor’s house, Rachel Lewis ran out and headed straight for the captain. “Jimmy!”

Spock stepped in front of his captain and she skidded to a stop, staring up at Spock in shock.

“Out of my way, Mr. Spock,” she said, after a moment. “I want to be sure Jimmy’s all right.”

“The captain is fine, no thanks to your ministrations.”

“I don’t know what you are talking about.” She went to go around Spock. “Jimmy!”

As Spock moved in front of her once more, she raised her hand and smacked Spock hard across the face.

The captain moved so fast he surprised even Spock. He grabbed her wrist and pulled her away from Spock. “Don’t you ever touch Spock again,” the captain said, coldly.

“What?” she gasped.

“Do. Not. Touch. Him. Try that again and I’ll stun your ass so fast you won’t know what hit you.”

“But, Jimmy, I just wanted to see you.” She bit her lip. “Are you all right? They said you were sick.”

“I wasn't sick, you drugged me.”

Rachel laughed. “Drugged you? What are you talking about?”

“The juice.”

She shook her head. “I love you.”

“Get real,” the captain said. He turned his attention away from her as Governor Lewis came outside.

“Jim? What’s going on?”

“Your daughter here drugged a Starfleet officer, Governor.”

“What? Rachel?” Lewis frowned. “What is he talking about?”

“I don’t know. Daddy.” She went to her father. “Maybe the illness he has got to his head.”

McCoy stepped up. “It’s true, Governor. I did the tests myself. I didn't have time to figure out what it was she gave him, but it was likely in the juice.”

Governor Lewis looked at his daughter. “Why would you do that?”

“I didn't!”

He sighed. “ _Rachel_. I am sorry, Captain. There’s a plant here on Hydra III that can be liquefied and added to something like the juice. It’s mostly harmless. It’s like a narcotic and makes the people here happy and content. But it can be used for mind control if used in large enough doses.”

The doctor scowled. “Do you know how many allergies he has? I wanna see this plant.”

“Of course,” Governor Lewis agreed. He turned to his daughter. “Why, honey?”

“It’s so lonely here! I hate it. I just wanted to have someone here with me,” Rachel said. “Someone to love me.” She turned and ran back inside the house.

“Once again, Captain. I am sorry for this. It should have occurred to me when she said you wanted to stay.”

The captain nodded. “No harm done.”

“You are very kind. Dr. McCoy, I will show you the plant.”

As soon as they headed toward the garden, Kirk turned to Spock. He stepped close and stared at Spock’s face. “She left a mark. Does it hurt?”

“Not really. It was more startling than anything else, Captain.”

“Still. I’m sorry.”

Spock inclined his head. “There is no need for you to apologize.”

“Yeah, I think there is.” Jim smiled a little. “I’m going to be really glad when we leave this planet behind.”

“On that we are agreed.”

****

“Where the hell is Bones?” Jim asked, pacing in front of the governor’s house. “How long has he been gone, Spock?”

“Twenty-three minutes forty one seconds. Forty-two.”

Jim stopped. “Something isn't right. They gave up the ghost too easily.”

“Gave up the ghost, Captain?”

He waved impatiently. “An expression.”

“A peculiar one.”

“Yeah. Shouldn’t have sent security back to the ship last night after dinner. What was I thinking?”

“Likely you were under the influence of the juice,” Spock said. Too kindly in Jim’s estimation. He’d screwed up, simple as that.

“And why didn’t I bring them back down?” Jim groaned in frustration. “I can be such an idiot sometimes.”

“Self-flagellation will not help, Captain.”

“I’m gonna go looking for him.”

“Perhaps security guards would be advisable at this time.”

Jim grimaced and took out his communicator.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you, Jim.”

Jim froze and turned toward the governor’s voice, which now came from behind him. He had a phaser trained on Jim and he was accompanied by two aides who likewise held phasers directed at him and Spock.

“What the hell, Lewis?”

Governor Lewis smiled and shrugged. “Let’s just say we’re making a deal with someone over the Federation.”

“Where is Dr. McCoy?” he demanded.

“Oh, he’s safe for now. But I can’t allow you to call your ship and alert Starfleet any more than you already have.” Lewis gestured to his aides. “Take them to join the doctor.”

As the aide came to seize him, Jim chopped him in the neck. Lewis fired his phaser and Jim went down, the last thing he heard was Spock yelling, “Jim!”  


	6. Chapter 6

Jim woke with his head pounding like his skull might just split open and his mouth tasting like it was stuffed with cotton. His vision was a little wobbly too.

“Captain?”

 _Spock_.

It was then he realized he was blinking up at his first officer from Spock’s lap.

“Fuck, I hate being stunned even more than being neck pinched.”

“You do not appear to be permanently damaged.”

“Bones?”

“Here, Jim.” 

Jim struggled to a sitting position and immediately took in his surroundings. It looked like they were in a prison cell with old fashioned bars with barely enough room for the three of them to move. Bones sat a few inches from where he and Spock were. He had a cut by his right eye and a bruise by the left corner of his mouth.

“You okay, doc?”

“I feel pretty stupid but otherwise I’m all right. Just banged up a bit. Looks worse than it is.”

Jim tried to tamp down his fury. “Did Lewis do this to you, Bones?”

Bones shrugged. “Lewis or one of his goons…oh excuse me…aides. They cold-cocked me.”

“Bastard. I’m gonna kill him and his bitch daughter,” Jim growled.

“Don’t resort to murder on my account, Jim.” Bones said. “How do you feel?”

“Nauseated like I always do after being stunned. Otherwise, I think I’m okay.” Jim looked to Spock who had remained silent. “And you, Spock?”

“I am adequate, Captain.”

“Klingons?”

“Most likely. Though it could be the Romulans or any number of alien species who do not ally themselves with the Federation.”

“My bet is the Klingons. This has their shenanigans all over it.”

Spock arched a brow. “Shenanigans?”

“Yeah, just…oh whatever. It’s gotta be them. And Grayson Lewis somehow got talked into going with them.”

“No doubt he got a ‘better offer’ as you would say,” Spock said. “Captain, Rachel Lewis seems to be particularly enamored of you. There is a significant chance she will attempt to influence you again with the mind control substance.”

“The stuff she put in the juice?”

“Affirmative. Captain, Vulcans are not susceptible to mind control of this nature, but clearly you and Dr. McCoy would be.”

Jim sighed. “Clearly. What do you propose?”

“A mind meld,” Spock replied. “I will link our minds and plant the suggestion—”

“Wait, what?” Bones interrupted.

“Bones, let him explain. Spock, can you prevent our minds from giving into this plant liquid she put in the juice?”

“That would be the intention, yes,”

Bones frowned. “So you’re going to prevent mind control with mind control?”

Spock inclined his head. “That is one way to view it, doctor.”

Bones snorted.

Jim rolled his eyes at Bones. “Okay, let’s do it, Spock. Do Bones first.”

“You’re the one the girl is interested in, Jim,” Bones pointed out.

“We don’t know if they may try it with all of us. Just cooperate, Bones. That’s an order.”

Bones huffed but didn’t protest further when Spock knelt beside him. “This isn’t gonna hurt is it?”

“Negative, doctor.”

Jim watched Spock rest his hands on his friend’s face as Spock’s counterpart had once done with him. In only a minute or so, Spock removed his hand.

“That’s it?” Bones asked.

“Indeed.” Spock moved away from Bones and returned to where Jim was seated. For a long moment Spock stared rather intently into Jim’s eyes and just when Jim was going to speak and ask him what was wrong, Spock’s fingers found his meld points.

“My mind to your mind, my thoughts to your thoughts.”

And then Spock was in his head. It was different than the other Spock’s meld, much more pleasant. Spock’s brain was fucking brilliant and so compelling that Jim found himself searching through different parts of Spock’s mind. He smiled and entered what appeared to be a door and inside were red rocks and hills, reminding Jim of what he’d seen of Vulcan before it was destroyed.

Then he spotted what looked like a rainbow over a waterfall and he just knew he had to get to it. Knew he had to touch it. It was so important. He must…he must.

Jim gasped and he was suddenly pushed through the door, and then he was back to staring at Spock who had dropped his hand from Jim’s face.

“Wow,” Jim breathed. “That was…intense.”

Spock said nothing, just continued staring, his dark eyes slightly wide.

“You two all right?”

Jim made himself look away from Spock to glance at Bones. “Yeah, fine. Why?”

Bones shook his head. “You were in the meld really long.”

“We were?” Jim frowned. “How long?”

“Ten minutes.”

“Ten? You were in it like a minute or two. Spock?”

“I…am fine, Captain. I believe the meld worked for our purposes.”

“Okay.” Jim smiled. He’d liked feeling and exploring Spock’s mind. He shouldn’t be that surprised, given his feelings for Spock.

Just then he heard footsteps approaching.

“All right, we’re on.”

Jim was not at all surprised when the same aides appeared at their cell door accompanied by Governor Lewis and his daughter, Rachel. He stood up, followed by Spock and Bones.

“Who are you working with, Lewis? And do you really think you’re going to get away with holding Starfleet officers prisoner?”

“We don’t intend to hold you as prisoners, Captain.”

“Murder is better?”

Lewis laughed. “Oh, dear, Jim, no. We were neighbors once. Do you really imagine I intend to kill you?”

“We were neighbors a long time ago, Lewis. And as I recall, even then you were a weasel.”

“Nevertheless, you will drink the plant extract, as will your officers. Then your crew will beam down here and drink it too.”

Jim snorted. “And then what? We’ll all be one happy bunch of shitheads under your control? And the control of who else? The Klingons?”

“We are not at liberty to discuss our business partners at this time.” Lewis gestured to the door and the aide opened it. “Come, it is time.”

“For?”

“To begin your assimilation into Hydra III society.”  


	7. Chapter 7

Spock had tried to place himself directly next to his captain as they were brought into the main room of Governor Lewis’s home, but one of the aides had put himself between them. Ever since the mind meld he’d shared with Kirk, Spock felt unsettled. Only being near the captain seemed to help.

He would need to clarify with his father but Spock was fairly certain that during the meld, Kirk had very nearly bonded them. Spock had not thought sharing a meld could accomplish that but when Kirk’s mind had reached out toward Spock’s, his own mind had eagerly wished for it. It had taken breaking the meld and every bit of control Spock had to push the captain out before it had fully formed. Spock could only hope the meld had done what it was supposed to for the captain’s mind before he broke it.

Even though the bond had not completed, Spock still felt the whispered connection. He had to clench his fists when the aide shoved his captain hard once they reached the room. Logically, Spock knew Kirk could handle himself, but he still could not resist the constant pull to protect him.

The woman, Rachel, faced them, a smug smile on her face. In her hand she held a glass of the dark red juice she had served Captain Kirk before.

“You first, Jimmy,” she said, coming to stand in front of him. “Drink the whole glass.”

“How do you intend to keep me under your control?” Kirk asked. “Eventually this stuff leaves the system, doesn’t it?”

Rachel smiled. “It does. But you will continue to drink it. This is the most pleasant way to have the plant extract, Captain, however, there are other ways. It can be injected into your veins.”

The muscle in Kirk’s jaw jumped. “And if I refuse?”

She shook her head and then took the phaser from one of her father’s aides. “I could simply stun you and inject it, of course, but where would the fun be in that? Drink it, Jimmy, or I’ll shoot—” She aimed it first at Dr. McCoy, but then with another shake of her head, she turned it on Spock “Mr. Spock. Yes, I think that’s the one I’ll shoot.” She turned the phaser to kill. “Drink it, Jimmy, or Mr. Spock dies.”

“Fucking bitch,” Kirk ground out.

Rachel laughed. “You say that now but soon you’ll be begging me again. Men are so stupid and so easily manipulated.” She pushed the juice glass into his hand. “Now, Captain.”

Kirk lifted the glass of juice to his lips and drank several swallows.

“All of it,” she said again.

The captain downed the rest of the juice and handed it back to her.

“How do you feel, Jimmy?” He linked his arm around her waist and pulled her close to her obvious delight. “That’s much better. I’ll leave you two to my father. Come, Jimmy.” And Rachel linked her arm with the captain and she led him from the room.

Spock had no way of knowing whether or not Kirk was under the influence of the plant extract or not.

Governor Lewis handed a glass of the juice to Spock and Dr. McCoy. “You will drink this, Commander, and then you will contact the Enterprise and start having your crew come down to Hydra III.”

****

Jim allowed Rachel to draw him to her bedroom and he went willingly into the room and let her close the door. Part of him had been concerned that Spock’s meld wouldn’t be strong enough to fight off the effects of the plant extract, but as she smiled at him, reaching for the clasp on the purple robes she wore, Jim realized he didn’t need to worry. He was fully himself. God, he loved Spock. And yeah, he wasn’t afraid to admit that to himself.

Her breasts exposed from the undone robes, Rachel looped her arms around his neck. “I’m so glad you’re here. We can get married. And I’ve been thinking.”

“Oh?” Jim grinned.

“With your crew at your disposal, we can take over the running of Hydra III ourselves. Daddy made a deal with the Klingons, but we can make our own deal.”

“I like the way you think,” he said, kissing the edge of her mouth. “Are the Klingons here now?”

She shook her head. “They left a few days before you arrived. They’re due to come back next week.”

“Perfect.” She pressed closer to him. “How did you find out about the plant extract anyway?”

Rachel smiled. “One day I got bored. We’d been told the blossoms were edible, so I started experimenting with the whole plant. I added some other ingredients to the extract, you know I was a chemist before I came here.”

“I remember you wanted to be.”

“After a few tries, I developed this formula. I control it and therefore, all who take it.” She laughed. “Because you were attracted to me, Jimmy, you were especially susceptible.”

Jim smiled. “Lucky for me.” He kissed her and put his arms around her waist. He’d seen her earlier put the phaser in a side pocket of her robes. His hand moving to her hip, he slipped his hand into the pocket and grasped the phaser. “Why don’t you take this off?”

With a smirk, Rachel stepped out of his arms and started to lift the gown off her shoulders.

He flipped the phaser to stun and aimed it at her. Her mouth fell open. Jim fired and she slumped to the floor. “Nobody threatens Spock.”

Jim wiped the back of his hand over his mouth and exited her bedroom. He ran down the hallway of the house looking for Lewis and Bones and Spock, phaser at the ready. He found them still in the main room. The aides had their backs to him and Lewis had one of their own communicators in his hand. He was holding it toward Spock.

Spock met Jim’s gaze across the room. “Here, Governor.” Spock reached over to Lewis’s shoulder and pinched just as Jim stunned first one and then the other aide.

“Great, now we just---”

Screaming alarms sounded throughout the house.

“Damn, Rachel must have awakened.”

Spock arched a brow. But whatever he was about to say got interrupted as three armed men came running into the room, followed quickly by a furious Rachel.

“Get them! And I don’t care if you have to kill them,” she said. She held a rounded throwing blade in her hand and even as Jim stunned one of the guards, she threw it, aiming for Spock.

“No! Spock!” Jim felt like he was moving in slow motion as he tried desperately to push Spock out of the way, but the blade struck Spock, slicing into his side.

****

Spock opened his eyes slowly, adjusting his vision to the bright overhead lights of the medbay. His side throbbed a little but it was nothing compared to the intense pain he’d felt when the throwing blade had sliced into him. He had been fortunate it was not the side with his heart.

“Hey, you’re awake.” The captain’s face appeared, hovering above him. “Bones, he’s awake.”

Kirk disappeared to be replaced by the much less pleasant visage of Dr. McCoy. He shone an even brighter light in Spock’s eyes.

Spock pushed at Dr. McCoy. “Is it your intention to blind me, doctor?”

McCoy lowered the light. “I was gonna ask you how you feel, but I’m guessing you’re okay.”

“I am adequate.”

“Pain?”

“Slight in my side and your hyposprays have made me nauseated as usual.”

McCoy rolled his eyes. “Would you like to sit up?”

“Yes.”

McCoy stepped away and pressed a button on the side of Spock’s biobed. It lifted until Spock was in an upright position. “I’ll be right back.”

“Captain, you are uninjured?” Spock asked.

Jim stepped up close again. There were dark smudges under his eyes but otherwise he looked well. “Yeah, no injuries for a change. This time it’s you.”

Spock nodded. “I am gratified you were unharmed. What happened on Hydra III?”

“Don’t worry about that right now, Spock. Let’s just say we’ve left it behind and leave it at that, okay?”

“Spock, you’re awake!” Nyota exclaimed hurrying toward them.

Kirk offered her a friendly smile. “And now that Uhura’s here, I’ll leave you to visit.”

Spock opened his mouth to protest for he did not want his captain to leave.

“You don’t have to go, Captain,” she said before Spock could speak.

Kirk shook his head. “I’ve gotta go talk to Starfleet. I’ll come by later, Spock”

“Yes, Captain.” His gaze lingered where Kirk had been long after he disappeared from the medbay.

Nyota took his hand. “We were really worried when they first brought you back.”

“I admit I was uncertain as to the outcome as well.”

“He’s barely left your side.” Nyota smiled. “The Captain.”

“Do you know what happened down on the planet?”

She bit her lip. “Leonard said he went berserk.”

Spock frowned a little. “Who?”

“Captain. Leonard said he became enraged when you were injured.” She hesitated. “Not sure exactly what happened or what’s in the official report, but Governor Lewis and his daughter are both dead.”

“Dead?” Spock’s breath hitched.

“Yeah. Captain’s had several communications with Starfleet since.”

“He is not in trouble?”

Nyota shook her head. “I don’t think so. Starfleet is pissed about the Klingons being involved with Governor Lewis. Like I said, I’m not really sure what any of the official reports said. Leonard might be able to tell you more.”

Spock suspected the doctor could but would not.

“I’m glad you’re going to be okay,” she said, tears glistening in her eyes. “Everyone was really upset.”

“I am sorry for worrying you, Nyota.”

She smiled. “I know. But I think you’re gonna be stuck here for a few days more.”

“Damn right he is,” McCoy said, returning to Spock’s side. “He needs rest, Nyota. Come back later.”

“Okay, Leonard. Thanks for letting me know he was awake.” She leaned down and kissed Spock’s cheek. “See you later, honey.”

When Nyota had left, Spock turned his gaze to Dr. McCoy. “The Captain?”

“He’s fine, Spock. Didn’t he tell you that?”

“Nyota said Governor Lewis and his daughter were killed.”

McCoy nodded. “That’s right. Unavoidable in the battle to get away.”

“And they were killed by?”

The doctor stared at Spock for a long time. “Does it matter?”

Spock thought about it and slowly exhaled. “It does not.”

“Get some rest, Spock.” McCoy pressed the button to lower the biobed once more.


	8. Chapter 8

“What the hell was that down there?” Bones demanded, entering Jim’s quarters without even bothering to announce himself.

Jim, who was standing near his desk, pulled his command tunic off his head. “Why don’t you come in, Bones?”

“Don’t fuck with me, Jim,” Bones said, grimacing. “That was insane.”

Jim shrugged. “I was protecting my crew.”

“Your crew? That wasn’t about your crew. That was Spock.”

“Spock is a member of my crew in case you’ve forgotten.”

“You were…unrecognizable on Hydra III. You’re a good fighter, Jim, but you were—”

Jim stared at him. “What? Super human?”

“That’s what I’m afraid of.” Bones deflated a little and sat on Jim’s sofa. “Damn it, Jim, promise me this isn’t gonna become an issue.”

“I’m not sure I can.” Jim sat next to his friend. “All I know is that bitch tried to kill Spock and if he had been killed it would have been my fault.”

“You couldn’t have known about Grayson and Rachel Lewis, Jim. No one knew.”

“I’m the one down there thinking with my dick as you so eloquently put it. I let her get to me and it almost cost Spock his life.”

“So you killed two people to save his life.” Bones grimaced. “There should have been trials, Jim.”

“You wanna file a report, Bones, do it.”

“Damn it, man, I’m not talking about filing a report. This is me, your friend, talking to you, my friend.”

“Rachel Lewis was still in attack mode. She’d already almost fatally wounded one officer and was going to attack another. Her death was totally justifiable.”

“And Governor Lewis?”

Jim stared at his own clenched hands. “He woke and went for a phaser, which he had switched to kill. It went off during the struggle.”

Bones’ jaw clenched. “And I’m supposed to ignore the marks on his neck.”

“I was forced to choke him during the struggle.” Jim reached over and squeezed Bones’ shoulder. “It’s fine, Bones. I’m fine.”

“Are you? Because this isn’t the Jim I’ve always known.”

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” Jim asked impatiently.

Bones sighed. “Jim, I don’t blame you, I blame me.”

“Huh?”

“Don’t you get it? If this is because of Khan’s blood, I did this to you. I’m the one who brought you back from the dead.”

“Bones, I love you. I really do. I don’t know what I’d do without you and fuck all if I ever wanna find out,” Jim said carefully. “But I am not a homicidal maniac.”

Bones was quiet for a while, then he reached over and patted Jim’s knee. “You’re sure?”

He smiled a little. “I dunno, Bones. I’m thinking if I were one would I admit it?”

“Ha ha, you’re so funny.” But Bones smiled. He stood up. “You should go see Spock. He wants to see you.”

Jim frowned. “Isn’t Uhura visiting?”

“She left hours ago. And they aren’t a couple anymore. You know that. You’re his captain but most importantly, you’re his friend. You went apeshit down there over him. Go see him.”

“You’re right.” Jim grimaced. “You’re always right.”

He got up and reached for the command tunic he’d discarded earlier and pulled it on over his head. Bones waited for him outside his quarters. Jim figured he wanted to personally deliver Jim to Spock.

“Admit it,” Jim said as they headed to the turbolift.

“Admit what?”

“You like Spock.”

“Do not.”

Jim laughed. “Yeah, you do. You’re the one telling me I need to visit him.”

Bones sniffed. “No one likes to be cooped up in medbay without any visitors, even the hobgoblin.”

Jim rolled his eyes as they got off the turbolift and headed to the medbay. “Whatever you say, doc.”

The doors switched open and Jim clasped Bones on the shoulder, gave it a little squeeze, and then turned to go to Spock’s biobed. He was reclined in a seated position.

“Hey, Spock.”

“Captain. I do not wish to keep you from your duties.”

“You’re not. Scotty’s on the bridge. I’ve got a few hours off. Wanna play chess or something?”

“Perhaps later.”

“Tea?”

Spock nodded.

Jim smiled. “Be right back.”

He obtained tea for both Spock and himself and then pulled up a chair to sit down.

After waiting through a few minutes of silence, Jim said, “I owe you an apology, Spock.”

“Captain?”

“I put your life in danger down on Hydra III with my behavior and—”

“Captain.”

“Let me finish.” Jim smiled to take the sting out of his words. “Just…if anything happened to you, Spock, I don’t think I’d get over it.”

Spock stared at him for a long time before he spoke. “It is the same for me.”

Jim blinked, feeling his chest tighten even as his heart began to pound hard. “Yeah?” And Lord, was that the best he could say?

“Jim, I know you do not share my romantic feelings—”

“Wait, what? Your—your romantic feelings? For me?” Jim winced at the hopeful tone of his own voice.

“Yes. I assure you that it will not interfere with—”

“I do, Spock,” Jim said quickly.

Spock blinked rapidly, a strange sight to see for a Vulcan. “You…do?”

Jim grinned, rose from the chair he’d been sitting in and reached for Spock’s hand. He clasped it in his, loving the warmth of Spock’s skin. “I do. I didn’t think you did.”

“I do.”

“We’re a couple of idiots, aren’t we?”

Spock almost smiled. “I do not think I would say that.”

“I would,” Bones said, approaching them. “How are you feeling, Spock?”

“Much improved, doctor. I can be dismissed from the medbay.”

Bones snorted. “Well thanks for your opinion, Dr. Spock, but I’m gonna keep you another couple of days.”

“Doctor, I assure you—”

“Can it, Spock. You’re staying. You’ll have to beg Jim to come and visit you.”

“He won’t have to beg. About that anyway.” Jim grinned when Spock arched his eyebrow.

Bones rolled his eyes. “You two are gonna be the death of me. Five more minutes, Romeo, and then he needs to rest.”

When Bones was gone, Jim stroked two fingers over Spock’s. “This is right, isn’t it?”

“Indeed.” Spock’s eyes were filled with warmth. Jim couldn’t resist leaning over to kiss his lips. Spock hummed low.  

“Is that all right?” he asked when he went to pull back.

“It is very all right.” Spock’s fingers grazed his jaw as he pulled Jim back for another kiss.

“There’s lot of that and more when you’re better.” Jim assured him, straightening away from the bed. He squeezed Spock’s hand. “Now I will let you rest. I’ll come back later, okay?”

“Please. Perhaps with a chess set?”

Jim smiled.  “Whatever you want.” He brought Spock’s hand to his lips and kissed the knuckles. He released him. “Okay, later.”

Jim went by Bones’ office on his way out. “Hey, is he really gonna be okay?”

Bones looked up from his terminal. “Yeah, he’ll be fine. He’s fortunate it was on the opposite side of his heart.”

“That bitch.” Jim said grimly.

“You can’t kill her all over again, Jim.”

“I wish I could. And don’t get that concerned look on your face. I’m fine. I’m not going to fly into some rage.”

“Thank God for small favors. Go eat something. You look too skinny.”

“Mother hen. All right. I’m going. See you later, Bones.”


	9. Chapter 9

“Captain?”

Jim’s gaze rose to Spock’s over the chess set he’d placed between them in the medbay. He smiled with a great deal of amusement. “Commander?”

Spock felt the tips of his ears warm. “Jim,” he corrected.

“What is it, Spock?” Jim moved his pawn.

“I wish to bring up a topic that may disturb you.”

Jim continued to smile though Spock did not miss the tension tightening his eyes. “Okay.”

“First I would like to remind you that I hold you in deep regard.”

Jim laughed then. “Must be really bad if you have to remind me of that, Spock. Okay, shoot.”

“I would like to discuss Hydra III,” Spock said carefully.

His captain’s expression didn’t change…much. He still smiled and the tension lines around his eyes had not lessened. But his body language shifted just a bit from being relaxed to guarded, on edge almost, but not quite. It was subtle.

“What do you want to discuss?” Jim picked up the mug of coffee he’d brought with him and took a sip, his blue gaze studying Spock intently.

“It is my understanding that both Governor and Rachel Lewis were killed during the battle on Hydra III.”

Jim nodded. “Your understanding is correct. And it’s your move by the way.”

Spock looked at the chess game briefly and moved his piece. He was uncertain how to ask his next question without being direct. But Spock preferred to be direct and honest especially with Jim. “Were they killed by your hand, Captain?”

“My phaser, actually.” Jim said, moving another chess piece.

“So it was set to kill?” Spock asked, unable to keep the surprise out of his voice.

“With Grayson we struggled over his weapon and it happened to be turned to kill when I fired it.” His voice was deceptively casual but his blue eyes had turned icy and for a fraction of a second Spock saw what’s Jim’s enemies saw. It chilled him. “Rachel…I turned my phaser to kill.”

“I see.” Spock moved his next piece

Jim eyed the game. “Was there something else you wanted to ask, Spock?”

“Was it possible to take either of them prisoner so that they could stand trial?” Spock asked, his gaze on Jim’s impassive face. “For instance, could you not have stopped her attack by stunning her?”

His captain smiled. “There are always possibilities, Spock. But Rachel was determined to kill you, Bones, and me. She was out of her mind. I regret having to end her life. But I am glad you’re alive and she wasn’t able to try again. Would it have been better to stun her and bring her to trial for her crimes? Perhaps. But I don’t think that’s what Rachel would have wanted. To live her life, however long that might be, as a prisoner? The Rachel I knew growing up would have hated that far more than having her life ended.” He moved his piece. “As for Grayson Lewis? He was determined to fight me. I tried to get him to surrender but he wouldn’t. It was his own phaser that killed him, Spock. Mine was on Stun but he knocked it out of my hand. Checkmate.”

Spock blinked. “Well played, Captain.”

“To be fair, your mind wasn’t on the game. Spock, I don’t enjoy killing. I grieve for every life that has ever been lost by my hand or because of my actions. I’m not a murderer. I did what I had to do on Hydra III. Okay?”

“Yes, Captain. I apologize if I have offended you with my query.”

“You haven’t.”

“You are certain?”

Jim smiled a genuine smile. “Yeah, Spock. And you? You’re certain you still hold me in deep regard?”

“I am sure.” He held out two fingers which Jim met. He could not deny he would have preferred a different outcome, but Spock believed Jim valued life. He had touched Jim’s mind and he knew the man who sat across from him. The man who held Spock’s heart.

Jim stood. “Now I should probably let you get some rest. Bones will be in here to yell at me soon.”

“Jim, there is more I wish to discuss with you,” Spock spoke up.

“Oh?”

“The mind meld we shared on Hydra III.”

Jim frowned and blinked. “What about it?”

Spock thought about what he wished to say. “You said when the meld was ended that it was…intense.”

“Right.”

“It was for me also.”

Jim came close to him. He gazed down at Spock. “Did it hurt you?”

“No,” Spock assured him. Jim reached for his hand and Spock grasped it in his. “My mind sought yours.”

But Jim shook his head. “No. I think it was the other way around. I remember. I wanted it. Whatever it was.”

Spock exhaled slowly, trying to squelch down the hope he felt at Jim’s words. “And my mind wanted to accept yours.”

“That sounds significant.”

“It is.”

“Okay, that’s enough lovey dovey time,” Dr. McCoy said, suddenly appearing at Spock’s bedside. “Jim, I told you not that long.”

“I know but—”

“No buts. You want Spock to be released from here right?” Dr. McCoy eyed Spock. “God knows I do. He makes a terrible patient.”

Spock arched a brow. “Doctor, I am prepared to be released now.”

“Oh, are you?” McCoy asked sarcastically. “I’ll be the judge of that.”

“I could spend the rest of my recuperation in my quarters. I assure you I could obtain more rest there than in the medbay where you and your staff keep me awake.”

“He has a point, Bones,” Jim said.

McCoy rolled his eyes. “Oh, so you’re both doctors now.”

“Come on, Bones.”

“Fine, but if he has a relapse, Jim, it’s on your head,” Dr. McCoy grumbled. “I’ll be right back.”

“Thank you,” Spock said when the doctor had moved away.

“You’re welcome,” Jim said with a smile. “And I really wish I could stay to talk more about what it means with our minds seeking each other and all that, but I really do have to get to the bridge.”

“Understood. When your shift is completed, perhaps you can come to my quarters?”

Jim rubbed his fingers across Spock’s and Spock was soothed by the touch. “Yeah, I’ll be there. Later, Spock.”

And then Jim left the medbay.

Perhaps before Jim finished his shift, Spock could speak with his father. He was certain that Jim’s mind had attempted to bond with his. And to Spock’s knowledge that would only happen in one particular circumstance.

_T’hy’la._

  


	10. Chapter 10

Jim had a bitch of a headache when his shift was finally over. And he found he was rather irritable. But he was glad he was going to see Spock. He went to his own quarters first and got rid of his command tunic and then replicated a chicken sandwich which, he finished eating before he went to Spock’s quarters.

He stepped inside when Spock opened the door. The Vulcan was seated behind his desk in front of the terminal, his fingers steepled together.

“Hey, aren’t you supposed to be resting?” Jim asked.

Spock studied Jim, his brown eyes unreadable. “I was speaking with my father.”

“Oh. To tell him about your injuries?”

“Negative, although that was discussed.” Spock rose from his chair and came around the desk. “You are unwell.”

“No, I just have a headache.” Jim frowned. “How do you know that anyway?”

Spock did not reply, but instead smoothed his fingertips over Jim’s temples.

“Spock?”

“You are restless too. Agitated.”

“Yeah, but—”

Spock’s fingers slid down to Jim’s cheek. “It is because you want.”

Jim could not help but smile at that. “Is it?”

“I do not speak of physical release.”

“Well, if you just let me get rid of this headache, we can talk about physical release.”

“Jim,” Spock admonished.

“Okay,” Jim said. “What are you talking about? And speak slowly, okay? My head really fucking hurts.”

“I may be able to help that if you will allow it.”

Jim hesitated, staring at Spock. He trusted Spock, of course he did, but really his head felt like crap and if Spock were suggesting what he thought Spock was probably suggesting, well Jim wasn’t sure he could handle it.

“I will not hurt you…ever.”

He met Spock’s gaze. “I know.”

“Trust me, Jim.”

Jim let out a long breath and nodded. “Okay. Whatever you’re gonna do, do it.”

Spock urged him to sit on the bed and then Spock sat next to him. His hand went to Jim’s face and found the meld points.

“When I speak of want it is your mind I speak of, Jim.”

“Meaning?”

“In the medbay I told you that during our last meld our minds sought each other.”

“Right.”

“I spoke to my father because I believe we are telsu.”

Jim frowned. “Telsu?”

“A warrior bond, revered among Vulcans. Our minds seek to bond, to become one with each other. T’hy’la, brother, friend, lover,” Spock explained. “It is my belief you felt such rage on Hydra III not because of Khan’s blood as Dr. McCoy believes.”

“You know that is what he thinks?” Jim asked, surprised.

Spock inclined his head. “I spoke with him before I left the medbay earlier. You were a large part of our discussion, including your actions with Rachel Lewis and Grayson Lewis.”

Jim frowned. “Not sure I like you two conspiring against me.”

“We were not. You are important to both of us so we share common ground.”

“Back to what you were saying. Not Khan’s blood.”

Spock nodded. “I believe you reacted the way you did because of your sense of protectiveness of your bondmate, me.”

Jim smiled a little. “I got pissed because they harmed my mate.”

“Essentially, yes.” Spock looked intently into Jim’s eyes. “If I meld us, our tentative bond will likely fully complete.”

“And that means…what exactly?”

“My thoughts will be yours, yours will be mine. We will be bonded in the ancient way. For me there will be no other. Only death can part us.”

Jim licked his lips. “For you? And what of me?”

“I cannot prevent you from seeking out others, though I will wish that you did not. Vulcans mate for life and for only one mate.”

“Hmm. But you dated Uhura.”

“I found Nyota’s company pleasing, however, I also did not know a t’hy’la bond waited for me. I only knew that my childhood bond had been terminated when the young Vulcan who bonded with me chose another. The bond we have is not possible with Nyota.”

“And if we never melded, our minds never fully bonded, what then?” Jim asked, wanting all the information up front.

“We would both always be seeking the other. Would always be restless, yearning. We would survive, we could live, be paired with others, but always there would be a part of us that we could not complete,” Spock said unemotionally.

Jim was not fooled. Spock might pretend it didn’t matter, but his hand on Jim’s face shook just an infinitesimal amount, but Jim noticed.

“And that would harm you?”

Spock did not reply which told Jim what he needed to know but he pressed it anyway.

“Spock?”

“It would not be ideal,” Spock acknowledged. “Jim, as important as a Vulcan bond of this nature is to me, your well-being is more important. If you are unable to reconcile yourself to the bond then we will not complete it.”

“What about your well-being?”

“It does not matter.”

Jim shook his head. “It matters to me. Spock, I love you. I have for so long. If this is what you need, then we’ll do it.”

“My needs do not supersede yours.”

“My mind wanted yours, you said so yourself. I can’t pretend I know anything about Vulcan bonds let alone ancient ones that start by themselves, but I do know I want you, I love you, and that’s enough for me. I trust you, Spock.”

Spock swallowed visibly and pressed his fingertips against Jim’s skin. “Then, may I?”

Jim smiled. “Hell, yes.”

“My mind to your mind, my thoughts to your thoughts,” Spock whispered.

In an instant Spock’s thoughts were in Jim’s head. It was weird, strange, unsettling. Then Jim focused, concentrated, and once more he saw himself walking toward something. At first it was blurry, foggy, he could not make it out, but the closer he walked the more clarity it took. He had expected to see the rainbow over the waterfall like before but this time it took the shape of a house. It was a house of white stone, all arches and open windows.

Then Spock appeared at one of the windows and Jim knew he had to reach him, knew he had to get to Spock.

_Yes, come to me, t’hy’la._

_Spock?_

_Yes, I am waiting._

It seemed to take a long time to reach the house but when he finally reached it, Spock disappeared from the window. Jim frowned but he stepped through the opening of the house, there was no closed door, and then he saw Spock waiting, his arms wide.

Jim smiled and walked into Spock’s arms as they closed around him.

 _Home_.

Jim breathed deep and Spock’s thoughts…psyche…surrounded him. Encased him in warmth, comfort…love. Spock was brilliant and compelling. And right.

Fingers slipped from his face and Jim opened his eyes to stare into the dark eyes of his t’hy’la.

“It worked, huh?”

Spock’s eyes were warm. “Yes, ashaya.”

“My headache is gone.” Jim touched Spock’s face. “I feel you.”

“And it is not unpleasant?”

“No, not at all. It is…wonderful.”

“For me also.”

“Spock,” Jim breathed, then unable to resist any longer, he leaned forward and kissed Spock deeply. Spock’s lips were eager on his as Spock’s arms wrapped around Jim and pulled him close. Jim was panting when he broke free. “I want you.”

“I do not object,” Spock assured him. “And we are conveniently on the bed.”

“Your injuries?”

Spock shook his head. “I am fine. I want you also, Jim.”

Jim bit his bottom lip. “Bones will kill me.”

“I do not believe the doctor has anything to say about our activities.”

He laughed. “Well, yeah, but if you are injured—”

“Jim.” Spock brushed his thumb across Jim’s lip. “I will not be.”

Jim found himself flat on his back then. “Wait, don’t you want me to take my clothes off?”

“I am capable of it.”

“I know but—”

Spock stood and yanked Jim’s boots off, throwing them against the bulkhead.

“Oh.” Jim licked his lips.

His Vulcan reached for the fastenings of Jim’s pants and quickly undid them with deft fingers. Jim arched up enough for Spock to pull them off together with his regulations briefs.

“You can take your shirt off,” Spock said, as he began to undress himself.

Jim nodded and pulled his shirt off over his head and let it fall to the side of the bunk. His gaze was focused on Spock. His defined pecs and abs, the dark hair curling on his pale chest. He lowered his gaze to Spock’s erect cock jutting out between his thighs.

“Mm.”

“You are staring,” Spock commented.

“Hell, yeah, I’m staring. You’re fucking gorgeous. Jesus, Spock, I never thought this would happen in a million years.”

Spock looked amused. “And now?”

“Now you’re everywhere inside me.”

“Not everywhere…yet.” Spock reached into a drawer and removed a bottle of lube.

Jim grinned. “I’m way too happy to even ask you why you have that.”

Spock knelt on the bed. “All that matters is what is between us now.”

“Yeah, you’re right.”

And then Spock kissed him, his tongue delving deep into Jim’s mouth and he lost himself to the feel of his Vulcan in his arms. He could have continued kissing Spock all night, really, but eventually, Spock broke off their kisses to squirt the lube from the bottle and prepare Jim.

Spock lifted Jim’s legs in the air and positioned himself between them. He had no idea of Spock’s experiences and this was no time to ask about them. Perhaps later or perhaps not. As Spock said, what mattered was what was between them now.

Jim reached for his own hard cock as Spock pushed into Jim’s hole easily.

“Yes, please. Spock, please.”

“What is it you want, t’hy’la?”

“I want you to fuck me. Hard.”

Spock’s hands gripped Jim’s thighs as he pushed in impossibly deep. “As you wish.”

Jim stroked himself fast and rough, in time and in match to the pounding Spock gave his ass. He liked it rough, hard, and it seemed Spock did too. He could feel what Spock felt, knew Spock could feel what he felt, and it was the best fucking thing ever.

Spock’s right hand moved from Jim’s leg to the meld points on his face and before Jim could speak, Spock had melded them once more.

“Oh, fuck,” Jim gasped, as every jolt in his ass and in his cock intensified. “Spock!”

“Mine,” Spock growled, slamming into him again and again.

“Spock…Spock…I…God.”

Then he was coming, shooting all over his own hand, all over Spock, everywhere. Spock growled again and then thrust into him hard and fast until he groaned his own release and poured into Jim.

Jim lost consciousness for a while and when he opened his eyes again, he was being held against Spock’s chest. “Hmm.”

“I did not hurt you, ashaya?”

“Uh-uh.” Jim smacked his lips. “That was…was…holy fuck.”

“I am assuming that is a good sentiment.”

“It is. It totally is. You’re fucking amazing.”

Spock’s hand massaged the top of Jim’s skull. “There are other things we will need to discuss.”

“Yeah?”

“This cannot be undone, Jim.”

He sighed. “I don’t want it to be undone, Spock. You have to know how happy I am. You feel it right?”

Spock paused, and then said, “Yes. And it matches my own contentment.”

“What else?”

“We will need to log our relationship with Starfleet.”

“Yeah.” He felt Spock’s unrest. He leaned up on his arms to study Spock. “What?”

“There is Pon Farr.”

“What’s that?”

“We do not speak of it.”

Jim smiled. “Then how will I know?”

“It is the madness. Every seven years Vulcans are compelled to…mate.”

“We mate now. Or we did? Right?”

“It is not the same,” Spock assured him. “I will take leave of my senses for approximately three point five days.”

“Approximately, huh?”

“It is not amusing, Jim.”

He kissed Spock’s chest. “If you say so. I’m sure it will be okay, Spock. We’ll get through it. Won’t we?”

Spock nodded, looking solemn.

“Anything else?”

“You are now mine.”

Jim chuckled. “Actually, Mr. Spock, you are now mine.”

Spock arched a brow. “You believe so?”

“I know so. I’m the captain. And furthermore—” Jim found himself once more under Spock. He swallowed, feeling the lust spring up between them. “Um.”

“What was that, Captain?”

Jim smiled and cupped Spock’s jaw. “Okay, I concede. We belong to each other.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's the end of another one.  
> Thanks for reading. I know it got off a bit rocky because I posted it and deleted it and reposted it, but it's finished now and I am happy with the result!


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